"Hope you are still available, but here it is! I took your advice and double cast the actors, with a continuous storyline. The kids love it!"
Last/first meeting it sounded much like the last time. They have a great enthusiastic group of people but no concept of production much less show. My intent this time was to introduce the story of Dantie's Inferno, much less attempt to line the various scenes together. It worked that night as a start. To follow is the next communication on the production I am keeping sort of at arm's reach.I’m now involved in installment #2 of something I was roped into from work. They washed their hands of it, but due to the spirit of the members, I could not just walk away. In any case for my involvement, I’m back another year now. They want to do an alternative haunted house. Last time it was just a bunch of un-related rooms of the various sins or things which would lead you to Hell. This year in pre-production of more than two weeks before hand, they are going to attempt to go with a more uniformed pagent type play and in a single room as divide by some drape as opposed to many rooms spread about a grade school and three floors. It’s a start at least.
To follow is my notes as if a second production meeting it is in this production that’s going to happen in a few weeks. I would hope that in presenting this no matter my own politics which given the intent of the show no longer matter, I’m only attempting to put the director/author’s writing on stage no matter my agreement or the politics of it. That one can see some design intent and unifying of many varied concepts civilians might offer and thus your need as a prob in more refining them and setting up for your own design. Also beyond that some added vision to the theme presented in making it more successful, and the start of both set and lighting design according to what you read in each scene. This thus might be a start to the design process with a director in working out various flow problems and design intent.
Hope it’s helpful as my notes to the director shaping the show she is writing. Not perfect certainly and there is still much to do but it’s a start that hopefully in showing the links as a designer, visions I have given a theme etc. you can see the beginning of the thought process in a production that’s not so far as organized as following a script but still just as important to them.First the location. Assuming a room roughly the size of the gym I had seen, we partition it off into rooms by way of pole and drape. Places like xxxx will have these things to rent. Expect it won’t be that cheap. Play on your various member’s connections to industry which like with what interested (place I work), got the show for a discount in the theory that it would lead to further business. That’s at least what I had explained in the rational for us doing the show. In any case, I would not expect much from (place I work), other than what I grab on my initiative for personal use. We do the high school as our charity gig official and that’s the extent of our doings at this point until we move to the new town which will no doubt get a larger involvement. Pole and drape is not really our thing anyway, we will look into the rest. Your 501c3 status as a very well advertised tax deduction if tax deductions still work that way will otherwise work to some extent to save you some money on donations but start now as it takes a long time for grants and donations much less discounts.
Another option for the rooms is to frame out some walls assuming lumber and say drywall is cheaper than the rental of drape and you have the labor to install some quick walls. I don’t expect they will need much in the way of joint filling but at least at that point you can paint and poster your walls as you will. Beyond booths, in going back to the concept of divided off rooms, we have drape between each area that is opened by the tour guide to allow the tour to proceed into the next area. The maze of haunted house itself, with perhaps at times minor deamons reaching out from the black to scare and assult the audience is more a minor part following the intent and script at this point. Once you get the script and locations down, than worry about it's actual locations and path.
It would also be nice to have some waist high drape separating the audience from the acting area but some rope or something tied off should otherwise suffice in keeping them out.
Individual rooms. You have a lot of bedrooms below which if it’s a given they are the same room, it’s going to be difficult to decorate them the same. Not sure what the split bedroom etc./four way scene is about in a design way.
I have this thing/concept about horror at the moment and it’s distance and movement thing. Long dark passages a stationary audience looks down where at the end of it is some brightly lit area at a distance. This works both for redemption when it’s not immediate to the audience - or to be kept separate from the audience. Than quick Satin type or torments of hell scenes between scenes at a distance so that we can just see what’s going on but it’s remote. This in addition to Satin scenes starting remote than while on a platform that has casters under it, moving forward towards the audience. TBA the rate of the movement in accordance to the action, but the movement of him (people pushing) should be out of sight from the audience so that his area approaches without rational in horror. Another option is for the "Media" type flaming chariot concept where by, perhaps it’s not a stage that Satin rides on, perhaps it’s a war chariot that has whipped and tortured slaves pulling it. Say he has a whip, or some of his minions have "cat of nine tails" type whips and wander along sides of the pulling procession of slaves to beat the slaves pulling the about 12'x12' decorated stage with surrounding walls or chariot pulling Satin towards the audience from some backdrop. The more slaves the better. Four is nothing, 12 or 16 is good. 100 is great. As opposed to a static scene of hell, perhaps we have people chained to walls and fire pits along the parameter of this Satin advancing asile of a setting, imagine a small stage or slave drawn cart passing by them as Satin calls to the souls he will soon have in the audience in addition to mocking those chained to the wall and pulling his carriage.
Beyond this type of distance equals distance or growing involvement is some low lit scene that’s perhaps at the rear of a long dark hallway where someone prays either beside a bed or to an alter. Distance is privacy and doing one’s faith in private as well as public is the key. Perhaps a few of these scenes between acting areas. The simple to view at a distance while moving to a new scene area. This in addition to all the bedroom scenes however means a lot of members sleeping in sleeping bags at home however. Perhaps keep it simple in a person on their knees at an upstage semi-profile angle away from the audience in a down lit simple scene. Perhaps some combination of both and more times and various places to pray between scenes at a distance and even close to the audience in keeping it varied but on message.
Perhaps a long narrow passage with someone praying at the end of it between each scene.
Scene by scene as presented to me so far:
"Split bedroom with posters, thong R-rated movies on top of the TV, sexy music playing, hottie shirt and mini skirt hanging on rack, magiznes with suggestive titles. Small boy and girl walks into bedroom."
Media: who’s bedroom is it? Not sure what a split bedroom is, is there one prissy girl side and one vampire like girl side like on the commercial for computers, or given the vampire girl or prissy girl is the theme can we cut the other part of the room not important? Assuming than the prissy girl has everything in her place and neat, the burn out girl than would have a very messy room half where her undies/mini-skirts are all over the place. Of all scenes, this one needs to be the most realistic and developed by way of decoration as per a stage play to draw the audience into the scene and play to follow. Assuming a lot on my part, we have a bedroom, half of it is with the script called for prissy sister who might later play a role in the story, the other is the "my" area she entertains boyfriends in.
Girl and guy go into the room to watch a porn video or something in changing over from some Manson like or heavy metal type music already playing in the room as the audience enters to a empty of actors stage. Let the audience see the porn video or soft porn movie scenes on the room’s TV, be very provocative as this will not given live actors distract from the live action once it begins. In the music, it should be easy enough to choose the most devil worshiper type music. During the scene, just enough video to shock some (people in underwear perhaps) but not so R-rating that we have a problem with the church. It’s recognized to be horror but I expect your members would object to more than this. Very important, in both the video and music, you need cuing and editing. Given a very short time between scenes, there is not going to be time to rewind between scenes the music or images you intend, you must create tapes and videos that have a prescribed amount of time plus some showing your chosen images or sounds, but do not require work to bring up the image again for the next audience beyond pressing play. In other words, say a minute of sound - the same song over and over, and the same with the video.
Who ever is the room mate to the good little girl, and what she wears, magazines with suggestive titles such as some girl porno magazine (it is a girl after all and girl porno in presentation will no doubt be less offensive in general but still get the message across) or some issue of sixteen with a provocative title or something as costume/prop placed half hazzardly all over the place - much less on a hanger (as if), one’s wardrobe is dependant upon the girl but given the duration of the scene you can probably mis and match with tact what you want to appear the key actress to seem to own. Let’s put the discarded thong right on the floor near the audience along with hip hugger all too short pants, short shorts etc. (Heck, let’s buy a 4' piece of clear plexiglass and place the thongs and bra’s under them as a door mat the audience walks over as they walk into the room.) Distance equals distance to the audience’s involvement thus putting the underwear close to the audience means involvement even if provocative. If you want a magazine with a suggestive title, it can’t just be on a desk, it needs to be half opened and hanging over the side of the desk covering the side of the desk presented to the audience. We are not talking about a vernacular of some girl’s bedroom, by mentioning these things, we intend to shock (and interest in a sick way) people with them and not just make them things to be scene while not watching the actors. (You as a rule can’t distract from the action of the actors, but in placing things as they would be in reality or neatly assigned to specific areas around the stage, we distract from the action with all but what is first seen. Go for the presentation and real slapping in the face of presentation of it at the start.) Beyond the floor right next to if not walked on by the audience, put the undies on the bed that the boy needs to push aside in an effort to sit down. That moment of contact and her bearing that which should not be seen is perhaps sufficient enough without actual exposure of a person wearing them. In other words, some amount of skin or shown to the audience graphically make out will involve them. It’s live and shock at this point which will involve the audience in the presentation no matter how much the shock value and old members leaving upon the initial scene. Sorry but it’s necessary. The PG rating otherwise will require perhaps the girl leading the boy into the room, some talk about her sister, intent for them to watch a video which requires her turning off the music and starting the video - leaning over in a provoccative way while doing so, him sitting on the bed as she turns on the video, than her coming to sit with the guy that removed her underclothes from where he was pushed onto the bed after a kiss to sit. Them going to a deep makeout that takes kiss to lay down, than blackout. She gets up, says some stuff and leads the audience to the next scene.
In scenery (thong) problem is, unlike some Sam Shepard play with corn stalks or sheep on stage as something to wonder about because it plays a role in his twisted portrait, a thong, a mini-skirt etc. unless in some huge bulk of them that’s cost prohibitive and distracting to the scene will if noticed at all unless oversized, these things you cite will at best distract from the scene you intend once the scenery out steps the players in the necessity to note or view. Guys will note such things, others will be offended. Make the scenery part of the action. Not saying that these props can’t be there, but given the short duration of the scene and the lack of personal involvement at this point with the audience, you either need a shocker of actress or actor coming out in a provocative way and showing it all as it were to show intent. (Not likely for this church group) Or possibly in getting the point across to the audience you intend to get your point across in another emotionally drawing way. I expect that underwear down stage and even a walkway of provocative items can be an option, but the guy removing or brushing aside a less obvious item of clothing in a him noting it type of 'scoring' way would be more involving.
Perhaps this is intent given the synopsis. This is what I would assume with intent. Party in the house, two girls share a bedroom, one is prissy and perfect (upstage), the other we intend thru the production to save is the vampire like person in Manson type makeup (or in other ways just not right) and in this case wearing the provoccative costume. (This provocative costume will be warn throughout up until the time of redemption where she gets something to cover her self be it chorus robe or cloak of some sort. Perhaps also the makeup is removed and a pretty girl is instead revealed after perhaps even some deforming crying like way upon the makeup.)
This also assumes the girl actress is the tour guide for the show as discussed. Tour comes in to this scene separate from the audience sent into the room in listening to the music and seeing the set in this room for a moment or ten. She does her bit on stage in drawing the audience to the action, than after a blackout stopping of the action and different lighted end of it leads the audience on her personal journey thru the rest of the show in areas she acts in as the leader of the audience stepping back into some moment of her journey or scenes she has been thru already. In this way, while leading the audience to the next scene the actress can have personal journey words to say to the audience as she takes them to the next scene/room and draws the drape apart.
You draw the audience into the action of this moving play with the first scene. If it does not involve them with spectacle and shock value in the first scene, it’s merely a show and not a method altering demonstration. The first scene is the key, make it everything in this production. Further scenes can be fun, scary, intentful and inspiring but they need to follow the hook of this girl to their reason for being there.
Next scene: (boy scene):
"talking about sexual conquests"
So the boy in the blackout has just run into the next room where he is in a locker room with the rest of his bud’s in bragging about conquests. I expect that given your school, lockers can be found even if not easy to remove initially from the hallway. Lockers open and closed are the key. You need both them and a changing bench near them supported at least by a sheet of plywood for the various people to sit or strut from. A full length mirror would also be useful for someone (antagonist) perhaps this bragging person to groom at once the rest of "the guys" finish bragging and the audience is quite again once moved. Given this second scene, this might be the perfect place for the tour leader/lead actress to give some exposition as to what little merit high school party sex has in the reality of the real relationship area. She leads the tour in while "the guys" are talking about their exploits in the locker room (make at least a few in a towel to locate the scene and draw the audience further in by way of perverse interest.) She than after also viewing this cue’d scene(she later found out about) with her former boyfriend - notch on his bedpost temporary exploit, has some words to say about the boyfriend who was not there for her later and what happened next to her.
Scene 3: Cell Phone and Internet Hell
"Text messages, IM, email and cell calls give you access like never before to wrong things."
This is sort of falling outside of the guidelines of the story presented so far.
We can cover this by personalizing it. Perhaps a call from the boyfried as the tour guide/protagonist leads the audience out of the room. It at this point would be really nice to be presented in a sort of long hallway with all kinds of presentations. A long hallway that has in side scenes presentations of keyboards and monitors showing the screen of sex tips and toys websites, various porn websites, a background sound of some porn like lyrics that are on a loop that keeps repeating the intended lyrics, a TV and VCR with a endless loop of some (soft) porn scene, a blow up/exploded pager and cell phone with it’s screen showing a clear cut message of (most important) the cell phone text message breakup between the girl and boy as huge in showing, perhaps a wall of more cell phones and pagers hanging off it, and more text messages in a provoccative way displayed on other over sized cell phones sitting on stands the audience is near.
Perhaps as a background in this long roped off hallway, beyond the various cell phones on stands near the audience, posters of cell phone messages and advertising posters of the availability of these technologies. $16.00 per month for this phone etc. as a link to the cheap charges of it all but dire consequences. Present the breakup in a very displayed and digital way, but after that and with no actors in this long hallway of a scene, don’t have any live action. This will allow time for the first two scenes to sink in, allow time for the tour guide to establish a leadership once she associates the breakup with her, and bring the haunted house into a multi-media and lead presentation show as opposed to just a bunch of scenes. Have messages perhaps of progressively worse from something like "I’m busy", to "Leave me alone - Bitch" all the way to "Satin Loves You" messages perhaps displayed on the phones on stands near to and presented to the audience as they pass by this more presentation than live event part of the show.
Scene 4: After-school party
"A night they never forget. Make-out party (drinking and smoking.)"
We started with this scene with the girl and boy, this is perhaps a later party when the girl begins to recognize that this is not what she feels most comfortable in as a setting. The other people make out, drink, smoke and party, she leaves the tour and takes part in the action at it’s center in first perhaps looking to seek out her friends that are shown to be more interested in their boyfriends they sit on the lap of than talking to her and perhaps on cue, there is a sound track to the music where people are laughing cutting in over it that grows progressively louder. The tour guide attempts more and more "friend’s" attention, only to be progressively more ignored than even pushed away. The "laughter" in the sound track sends her away to the next person at the party to ask help. She tries with them, ignored, the sound track of party laughter at someone begins and she tries for someone else. Progressively the "friends" by way of scene back of hand wave her away to the point of pushing her away at the end while the rest of the characters in a progressive way during the laughter part lean across to a friend to "tell a secret to them", than as it progresses point in a hiding way, than as the scene ends, they all during the laughter end up directly pointing at her and openly laughing at her.
Scene 5: Girl Sleep over - Brag Party
"Brag about how they got away with it, plans to repeat, some feel the guilt."
Okay, our tour guide runs out of the past room in spreading the drape for her tour to follow. Perhaps the cast of the last scene also start to mock the audience in laughing and pointing at them, if not for the lingers on people - directly confronting them.
In any case, our lead actress after a moment perhaps up against scene 6's drape in gathering herself and her audience, takes a part in the scene of sleepover. Perhaps she climbs into a sleeping bag down stage of the rest of the characters than. The girls brag and sing the praises of the guys they dream about and have exploited, this lead actress is interested initially in the action - as if at points attempting to gain the attention of the rest in asking time to speak and change the subject but constantly loses the initiative of the next guy or subject talked about. She is downstage and marginalized amongst the girls in the more upstage area surrounding the leader girl in the bed most practiced in this having fun art. Depending upon how the script works out, the lead tour guide we see is either ignored and even sort of pointed at in mocking, or she gets the attention of her "friends" but they disassociate themselves with her. In any case, I take it by way of your scene that she has just fallen out of popularity with both her buddies in the last scene and her girlfriends in this scene.
Scene 6: 4 Bedroom Scenes (dormant alcoholic & positive pregnancy test, separation from parents, sexual abuse victim declares power to use men, snse they hurt her.)
Wow’ what a scene. Described as the boyfriend awakens a generational curse of alcoholism, the girl pregnant by someone else the second time, another girl suffers with depression because of the separation of her parents. Someone else is date rated before and in her anger does not care who she hurts.
Delete this entire scene as described. Too much going on, little to do with the tour guide’s story as presented in this scene and too much going on that does not relate to our personal journey as an audience. You want a lot, have to present it elsewhere as it’s more than one story otherwise. Ok, X-guy recognized a curse of alcoholism, perhaps even being a un-wed father for more than one girl. During the party scene, perhaps with the right words spoken he stumbles down stage in telling the audience this two scenes ago as a side part of the specific scene. Perhaps it’s even the boyfriend that gives exposition to his real fear of having another child and thus just walking away from his past girl friend for the night - our tour guide. Perhaps one of the girls last scene is pregnant again to some other boyfriend and very pregnant in showing, but as opposed to our lead heroin, she is proud in it being cool that she has another kid about to be added to her high school kid pack of them. Perhaps she is even proud in that it means more welfare money and she can now afford cable TV without the need of getting a job. Exposition of the other girls brag and talk about in addition to the guys at school they have conquered. Date raped by perhaps one poor soul of a meek girl in a upstage corner of the room as requested advice from her "friends" but as per worked out in the script of - her friends just marginalis her further and laugh at the remote feeling by her that she did not want it or that it was a real rape. Get the point across during the sleep over scene in helping the lead character we by now assume is pregnant and all alone having found now not only her boyfriend and friends in general not supporting her, but her girlfriends - especially this lead girl on the bed in not supporting her. Pregnate is her fault as told to this other girl or pointed out as their own fault. The cool girl on the bed as for instance has never had these problems, her exploits for instance are a legend to live up to. All those that don’t continue to follow her or fall by the wayside in this peer group. Perhaps the queen on the bed even mocks the girl who’s parents split up at some point in raining over her followers.
In scene one if you want to present a date rape it should build upon the situation of our tour guide. Linger in blackout with her screaming "No!" after a few "Stop’s"! If this is a story about a girl, than it needs to be about this girl, otherwise in scene five you need to implement that marginaized supporting character in the upstage corner by way of script to have had this problem in a way that matters but is less involving and caustic to the audience but still gets the point across. One might also have the room’s queen on the bed referring to date rape drugs in a cool sort of way than.
For me, Scene 6 does have some form of role, it’s in confirming our tour guide has realized she has a real problem of being pregnant for the audience. She up to now has no support of the boyfriend, her friends at the party turn away and mock her, her girlfriends specifically also don’t support her in her problem. Perhaps even telling any of them will be a problem.
Scene 6 might be a smaller hallway between scenes and in in general deleted. Just a bare bones toilet off stage, a wrapper for a pregnancy test method alone on the floor, and a large "test positive" poster as seen covering the backstage wall. Let’s do a bunch of exploded headlines in the newspaper posted all over these blackened walls, "teen pregnancy" and across from the scene, some blackboard filled with writing all over it with census statistics, poverty ratios etc. showing a grim future for this poor girl.
She just leads into, pauses in the area, than leads the crowd into the next area. The personal choice and realization is got by the audience without need to say anything else. As a sound effect on a loop, pounding on a door by someone pleeding to get into the washroom - someone telling our tour guide that they "gotta" get into the bathroom, mom and dad fighting in the background over this. Sound effect as a constant - every few seconds, pounding on the door breaking up the background of Mom and Dad fighting with even Mom being beaten in this sound tape loop of sound effect home life.
That’s at least as I see the horror of this scene as easier and more specifically put.
Scene seven: " "Jail Cell" (Boyfriend is charged with molestating of a minor - tour guide is 16.) I’m thinking that at some point in between rooms, it might be better for some cops to pull someone out of the audience - a shill and arrest him on these publically stated charges. For this, the boyfriend needs to become a part of the audience. A jail cell if you will forgive me is lame in something that most will view as exhibit and expect they will never see in their holier than though status. Arrest a member of the audience and right in front of them and you have their - all of their involvement. Smack around the boyfriend even but it will take careful coordination with our tour guide in showing her involvement - escaping to a higher religious plane and lawful justification of her role type way. Perhaps the initial boyfriend is much, much older, is scraggly etc. seeming as a description of him.
Scene eight: "Abortion room" (X actresss represents adult X.. Who is at the point of suicide, as the demon try and convince her to kill herself, the ganels show her the way to Jesus via the salvation prayer.
You know, I just don’t see this scene given your intent of last time it was portrayed in show gory and well acted abortion room as a scene. We have the protagonist by now with a serious problem of an un-wanted baby growning in her, she has by way of acting and action just gotten her boyfriend arrested in having crossed out the rest of that or the previous scene as not important or part of the journey, taken us to a leep of justice in what was done in him having done this to her. She has grown in the eyes of the audience beyond her peers and girl friends. Now it’s time for personal choice which I myself might dispute with you but have to in any case rectify with the scene and story. (We won’t get into my own views on all this thing as it is your presentation which I on the whole support the presentation of.) Daddy getting arrested might take place in this for the most part down lit room without any scenery. Once daddy is led away, lets’ personalize this obvious choice.
Daddy gets arrested in the same room as this scene, than the lights go up on an out of audience area and the audience see Mom/tour guide pressed spread eagle against a window of an abortion room. Beyond this window frame the audience peers thru and the tour guide in pressing against it gets a very clear view of, we have your famous abortion scene. It can be as wicked as you plan given the horror now presents itself upon the tour guide in by the end of it and her peeling herself off the window, leads painfully the audience away from the hellatious scene and onto the next.
Scene eight: "Satin’s Meeting" Long hallway, or perhaps the above less wide but in depth hallway but moving platform he moves around or war chariot he taunts the souls from in addition to the audience. This is a throw away scene, in the tour guide having walked away from the abortion, she is either taunted by Satin to do away with the kid anyway if not as presented before the previous scene in tempting her, or he just calls to all in a sort of black humor way she as tour guide is dumbfounded in as presentation but gains inspiration from. Not sure if two strongly acted by the anatomist scenes in a row are a good thing or not given the talent I expect for both scenes, but this is how it’s presented. Perhaps have a pre-scene with Satin challenging and offering solution in all his power before the abortion scene as part one, than after the abortion in him in a less than all involved moving scenery way, have him running after the lead and audience in asking to come back, the problems she will have, lack of support in the community etc. in attempting to get her back to the room.
Thus before abortion, we have some glory and scare of Satin on a chariot and long room in being scary but reasonable in having the abortion as the only solution, than a abortion room she chooses against, followed by a linearly long room of the same satin taunting the lead and audience, asking her to come back, telling her to come back etc. but walked away from. Long room, lots of taunts and definate need for a rope to separate audience from Satin. We also are left with the question of if she had it done or not - below will be a description of blood but it is also more of a symbolism type of thing and could be more the soul bleeding out of guilt for considering it than reaity.
Scene nine: "Who you gonna serve" (X represents and adult X... who is at the point of suicide, as a demon try and convince her to kill herself, the angels show her the way to Jesus via the salvation prayer.)
Another throw away scene. Unless you have more than one Satin per group, this is not a individual room. It also just don’t work given the pregnancy / date rape concept. Older by 9 - months? Sorry but invest in many tour guides rather than an older than type if possible for this scene. You have a lot of tallent perspective, use them kids even, it is their show.
If necessary perhaps have the tour guide seek refuge in a well placed sofa that the Devil upstages and leans over at times in this hallway. Perhaps even the boyfriend or some other guy is already on the sofa in a "yea I care for you type of way." They than care for but also take advantage of. Perhaps the girl’s dad sits down in the boyfriend’s place and cuddles her for a moment but perhaps hears a cop siren and bolts away. (Yes it’s stereo typing and not accurate but it’s a statement none the less and reason to move onto Mom.) Perhaps Mom finally sits down on the self doubt and "hell" sofa to support her kid. Devil lingering and abusing from the upstage by now and distracting from away. Mom sits down now and either does not care or is supportive depending upon your take of it all. Offers advice to go to the next scene or the tour guide does it on her own.
Still we have a sofa right off the audience the girl cowers in, some amount of people both supporting and not supporting her if not only un-supporting of her. Suicide can be thoughts brought up by the Devil in between people that sit on the sofa with her. Perhaps in keeping the audience attention and them away from her, this sofa is positioned and located atop a high staircase and platform that all can see her from and is too far in distance for them to personally get involved. The devil should be able to look over her on the sofa by way of ladder, but at this point also be able to have the rest of the acting area to move about as it’s his.
Scene nine B: (The audience help her say the prayer.. But does not know if was too late or not.) Speaking as an outsider again to this as perhaps best in someone not involved but in a scene that will most draw the audience to your intent, this scene both does not have location and does not have a place in reality or story. Not really sure how you intend to implement this.
I see this as part of the last scene. Either Mom in prayer helping or our tour guide alone in finding her own way perhaps starts to say this "Lord’s prayer". It’s a chant, with every sentence of it in the past scene the audience will hopefully start to repeat especially if helped by shills (members of your crew) in the audience, the devil is more confounded than chased away. What ever the case, the Devil in his personality would be by my thoughts of it the one to mock and challenge the audience to sign this book of support for the heroin as opposed to the more reasonable and easy supporting him. Perhaps behind the audience by way of down light this huge book to sign, a huge guest book is revealed by his mocking cue for the audience to sign. Given the talent of your Devil, he should have no problems in making the audience sign the book of support. Otherwise, he can mock and challenge an equally strong Mom and perhaps tour guide in gaining strength. Want your visitors to sign, this is the time.
If they don’t know if it’s too late or not, the Devil will have to provide the inspiration in any case as the protagonist grows weaker on her on or in Mom’s arms.
Scene Nine C: "Hell" (Satin has lost souls of teens in all types of bondage "torturing" them. Has a book of death that he taunts the audience about.) Again not a scene unless more than one devil which would not work well given different personalities and story lines.
Instead, this book of his, perhaps incorporate into the before scene. The Teens under torture are perhaps those pulling his wagon in having told their story beforehand while pulling the cart. Perhaps one by one as they pull the cart and get whipped afterwards, they tell their simplified story of how they got into hell one by one. In any case, this scene is well already done as a short scene, the more climax final scene following the abortion needs to focus upon your intent I think in getting public support by way of signing for this poor girl.
By the end, he is vanished by his and perhaps’ Mom’s words and the words of God in coordination with the book signers and Word of God. The girl / tour guide gains strength in this new found support and finally banishes him than leads the audience to the next room.
Scene Nine D: "Step Off" (Demons against Angels. Angels win and stomp demons.)
I expect you already realize that this scene as a tour of the Hell anti-fright house we are viewing is about over with. While there is only so many planes of Hell, our story as at least I see it as more narrowly defined to one person’s story the audience can better communicate with, is just about done by now. She won. This challenge - swords no doubt involved in expelling demons is not the point of the conflict. If nothing else, the angels in the last part of this room’s scene chase the lingering devils out on cue but otherwise have no true role.
Instead, what if this were a double sized room. First we have a sofa upon steps the tour guide runs for refuge upon. She has her tribulations of soul on it and the upstage of it is revealed once the Satin we met two scenes before comes to play on her. (You are going to need two Satins given timing and a tour.) Satin taunts her in her deserving either the abortion or having a welfare kid. Does not matter for him, it’s either a soul he gets right away or get’s to taunt also in acquiring.
Mom as a third role is silent but begins to pray over her child now. She does not hear Satin, only cares for her child in now praying. Otherwise the child in finding inner strength in spite of the challenges and torments she hears, (perhaps the sister who’s room she shared helps her instead of these people, so many variations we could have. Sister at the door in the opening scene objecting to a boyfriend in the bedroom, than the door slammed in her face.) These people help her or she gets with God and finding her way in any case. The audience helps find and support her in finding the way by way of signing the book as the scene builds.
But as I said, perhaps this is a double wide scene in being both two sides of the audience in the center, and both God/Jesus and Satin on stage at once. Do you remember this long room in the last time we attempted the show, a Jesus in the last room welcoming in the end all comers? Distance, far away, but in the direction the audience traveled, and oh the stage presence the talented actor had and highlight by spot he had.
Let’s re-create it. First signer to the book perhaps gets a dim light on Jesus somewhere out in the distance. He does not move or talk to Satin but is still dimly lit way upstage of the book. More people sign the book and the down light on him in a welcoming pose gets brighter up until it sparkles in light on him. We also add a front light so his features are not so ghostly. We build upon this light, still him remote, but given the building as opposed to visibility light behind us, we are drawn to him at a distance. Satin than mocks from behind the audience. If not he directly challenges those that would dare look to him instead of Jesus figure.
At some point our tour guide/protagonist is welcomed to him. She looks back to the audience as she walks to him in conveying the necessity of them in her voyage, grows in look from despising them all perhaps to thanking them etc. She walks the path of light now lit to Jesus. Perhaps it’s a path you open up to others in the audience to follow as sent there and escorted by way the shills in the audience. Satin by now is banished. Jesus did not have much to do with it, it was more an interplay between the girl and him in denying him or Girl, Him and Mom in defending her. What ever the end result, Satin leaves and it’s quiet. Perhaps before this point there is some very subliminal suffering of souls music that fades out and upon the walk is replaced by a inspiring rhythm.
In costume change, Perhaps during the arrest of the "boyfriend" scene, she downs a hospital gown that is say plain white and simple but not seen yet to be stained with black light paint all over with red paint. First we see the pure and simple white in atoning for the sins and making one’s way with justice, than we get the blood. We than while she is prostate against the window light up with some black light lamps that show the UV-now bloody gown over her cheap woman outfit and atoning gown. Further black light directed to the sofa and stairs perhaps reveal a lot of UV-red blood all over the stairs. You don’t have to say that it was done or it was the choice, only state the blood involved and shame in even considering it. There will be shame or at least some deep thoughts no matter the choice afterwards no matter the benefits or rational for not doing it. This UV-blood now along with Satin’s carefully worked out words bring up the problem as exposition either way if it was done to the girl or not.
In leaving the sofa, perhaps she pulls the sofa cover off it and put’s it on as a long flowing chorus gown or dress of reflective and perhaps UV supplemented colored gown in a third costume. Some sort of Queenly or marriage gown type of thing which glows in both UV and spotlight. Perhaps if part of the story, Mom puts it on her after Satin is banished by her in a "big Momma" type way in adding at least a element of comedy. In any case, as our tour guide walks the distance between sofa, stairs, audience area and that long distance to Jesus, she in her almost wedding gown of purity pulls the loop from her hair so it flows down further bridging that purity to her acceptance as she walks the long walk.
If the audience is still lingering, once she finds perhaps a hug from Jesus, she jestures for the audience to follow in ensuring they all will. Jesus off this path welcomes but stays a little distant. She walks out the door into a prayer room where she kneels up stage of the rest of the pews. The audience either follows or exits our little passion play.
This whole last scene thus gains as much importance as the first scene in development.
Thus is some of my further advice in unifying the story into a unified program. Any help? Chat with you I expect soon about it. This is advice do not forget, and you are it’s project manager. Do not follow any suggestions as word of law, only as I in attempting to further refine this program might see some solutions in unifying it. It’s your show, my intent is to push it beyond the good show into the great show. I see many themes in this show still, while they can be sub text, I think further refining into one unified theme in this production is still necessary. Other productions can have other themes, let’s work on the main one at this point and keep them in mind for later ones.
Good start, hope my refining is useful, we can talk about the build and lighting with details later after the script and story is locked down.
Last/first meeting it sounded much like the last time. They have a great enthusiastic group of people but no concept of production much less show. My intent this time was to introduce the story of Dantie's Inferno, much less attempt to line the various scenes together. It worked that night as a start. To follow is the next communication on the production I am keeping sort of at arm's reach.I’m now involved in installment #2 of something I was roped into from work. They washed their hands of it, but due to the spirit of the members, I could not just walk away. In any case for my involvement, I’m back another year now. They want to do an alternative haunted house. Last time it was just a bunch of un-related rooms of the various sins or things which would lead you to Hell. This year in pre-production of more than two weeks before hand, they are going to attempt to go with a more uniformed pagent type play and in a single room as divide by some drape as opposed to many rooms spread about a grade school and three floors. It’s a start at least.
To follow is my notes as if a second production meeting it is in this production that’s going to happen in a few weeks. I would hope that in presenting this no matter my own politics which given the intent of the show no longer matter, I’m only attempting to put the director/author’s writing on stage no matter my agreement or the politics of it. That one can see some design intent and unifying of many varied concepts civilians might offer and thus your need as a prob in more refining them and setting up for your own design. Also beyond that some added vision to the theme presented in making it more successful, and the start of both set and lighting design according to what you read in each scene. This thus might be a start to the design process with a director in working out various flow problems and design intent.
Hope it’s helpful as my notes to the director shaping the show she is writing. Not perfect certainly and there is still much to do but it’s a start that hopefully in showing the links as a designer, visions I have given a theme etc. you can see the beginning of the thought process in a production that’s not so far as organized as following a script but still just as important to them.First the location. Assuming a room roughly the size of the gym I had seen, we partition it off into rooms by way of pole and drape. Places like xxxx will have these things to rent. Expect it won’t be that cheap. Play on your various member’s connections to industry which like with what interested (place I work), got the show for a discount in the theory that it would lead to further business. That’s at least what I had explained in the rational for us doing the show. In any case, I would not expect much from (place I work), other than what I grab on my initiative for personal use. We do the high school as our charity gig official and that’s the extent of our doings at this point until we move to the new town which will no doubt get a larger involvement. Pole and drape is not really our thing anyway, we will look into the rest. Your 501c3 status as a very well advertised tax deduction if tax deductions still work that way will otherwise work to some extent to save you some money on donations but start now as it takes a long time for grants and donations much less discounts.
Another option for the rooms is to frame out some walls assuming lumber and say drywall is cheaper than the rental of drape and you have the labor to install some quick walls. I don’t expect they will need much in the way of joint filling but at least at that point you can paint and poster your walls as you will. Beyond booths, in going back to the concept of divided off rooms, we have drape between each area that is opened by the tour guide to allow the tour to proceed into the next area. The maze of haunted house itself, with perhaps at times minor deamons reaching out from the black to scare and assult the audience is more a minor part following the intent and script at this point. Once you get the script and locations down, than worry about it's actual locations and path.
It would also be nice to have some waist high drape separating the audience from the acting area but some rope or something tied off should otherwise suffice in keeping them out.
Individual rooms. You have a lot of bedrooms below which if it’s a given they are the same room, it’s going to be difficult to decorate them the same. Not sure what the split bedroom etc./four way scene is about in a design way.
I have this thing/concept about horror at the moment and it’s distance and movement thing. Long dark passages a stationary audience looks down where at the end of it is some brightly lit area at a distance. This works both for redemption when it’s not immediate to the audience - or to be kept separate from the audience. Than quick Satin type or torments of hell scenes between scenes at a distance so that we can just see what’s going on but it’s remote. This in addition to Satin scenes starting remote than while on a platform that has casters under it, moving forward towards the audience. TBA the rate of the movement in accordance to the action, but the movement of him (people pushing) should be out of sight from the audience so that his area approaches without rational in horror. Another option is for the "Media" type flaming chariot concept where by, perhaps it’s not a stage that Satin rides on, perhaps it’s a war chariot that has whipped and tortured slaves pulling it. Say he has a whip, or some of his minions have "cat of nine tails" type whips and wander along sides of the pulling procession of slaves to beat the slaves pulling the about 12'x12' decorated stage with surrounding walls or chariot pulling Satin towards the audience from some backdrop. The more slaves the better. Four is nothing, 12 or 16 is good. 100 is great. As opposed to a static scene of hell, perhaps we have people chained to walls and fire pits along the parameter of this Satin advancing asile of a setting, imagine a small stage or slave drawn cart passing by them as Satin calls to the souls he will soon have in the audience in addition to mocking those chained to the wall and pulling his carriage.
Beyond this type of distance equals distance or growing involvement is some low lit scene that’s perhaps at the rear of a long dark hallway where someone prays either beside a bed or to an alter. Distance is privacy and doing one’s faith in private as well as public is the key. Perhaps a few of these scenes between acting areas. The simple to view at a distance while moving to a new scene area. This in addition to all the bedroom scenes however means a lot of members sleeping in sleeping bags at home however. Perhaps keep it simple in a person on their knees at an upstage semi-profile angle away from the audience in a down lit simple scene. Perhaps some combination of both and more times and various places to pray between scenes at a distance and even close to the audience in keeping it varied but on message.
Perhaps a long narrow passage with someone praying at the end of it between each scene.
Scene by scene as presented to me so far:
"Split bedroom with posters, thong R-rated movies on top of the TV, sexy music playing, hottie shirt and mini skirt hanging on rack, magiznes with suggestive titles. Small boy and girl walks into bedroom."
Media: who’s bedroom is it? Not sure what a split bedroom is, is there one prissy girl side and one vampire like girl side like on the commercial for computers, or given the vampire girl or prissy girl is the theme can we cut the other part of the room not important? Assuming than the prissy girl has everything in her place and neat, the burn out girl than would have a very messy room half where her undies/mini-skirts are all over the place. Of all scenes, this one needs to be the most realistic and developed by way of decoration as per a stage play to draw the audience into the scene and play to follow. Assuming a lot on my part, we have a bedroom, half of it is with the script called for prissy sister who might later play a role in the story, the other is the "my" area she entertains boyfriends in.
Girl and guy go into the room to watch a porn video or something in changing over from some Manson like or heavy metal type music already playing in the room as the audience enters to a empty of actors stage. Let the audience see the porn video or soft porn movie scenes on the room’s TV, be very provocative as this will not given live actors distract from the live action once it begins. In the music, it should be easy enough to choose the most devil worshiper type music. During the scene, just enough video to shock some (people in underwear perhaps) but not so R-rating that we have a problem with the church. It’s recognized to be horror but I expect your members would object to more than this. Very important, in both the video and music, you need cuing and editing. Given a very short time between scenes, there is not going to be time to rewind between scenes the music or images you intend, you must create tapes and videos that have a prescribed amount of time plus some showing your chosen images or sounds, but do not require work to bring up the image again for the next audience beyond pressing play. In other words, say a minute of sound - the same song over and over, and the same with the video.
Who ever is the room mate to the good little girl, and what she wears, magazines with suggestive titles such as some girl porno magazine (it is a girl after all and girl porno in presentation will no doubt be less offensive in general but still get the message across) or some issue of sixteen with a provocative title or something as costume/prop placed half hazzardly all over the place - much less on a hanger (as if), one’s wardrobe is dependant upon the girl but given the duration of the scene you can probably mis and match with tact what you want to appear the key actress to seem to own. Let’s put the discarded thong right on the floor near the audience along with hip hugger all too short pants, short shorts etc. (Heck, let’s buy a 4' piece of clear plexiglass and place the thongs and bra’s under them as a door mat the audience walks over as they walk into the room.) Distance equals distance to the audience’s involvement thus putting the underwear close to the audience means involvement even if provocative. If you want a magazine with a suggestive title, it can’t just be on a desk, it needs to be half opened and hanging over the side of the desk covering the side of the desk presented to the audience. We are not talking about a vernacular of some girl’s bedroom, by mentioning these things, we intend to shock (and interest in a sick way) people with them and not just make them things to be scene while not watching the actors. (You as a rule can’t distract from the action of the actors, but in placing things as they would be in reality or neatly assigned to specific areas around the stage, we distract from the action with all but what is first seen. Go for the presentation and real slapping in the face of presentation of it at the start.) Beyond the floor right next to if not walked on by the audience, put the undies on the bed that the boy needs to push aside in an effort to sit down. That moment of contact and her bearing that which should not be seen is perhaps sufficient enough without actual exposure of a person wearing them. In other words, some amount of skin or shown to the audience graphically make out will involve them. It’s live and shock at this point which will involve the audience in the presentation no matter how much the shock value and old members leaving upon the initial scene. Sorry but it’s necessary. The PG rating otherwise will require perhaps the girl leading the boy into the room, some talk about her sister, intent for them to watch a video which requires her turning off the music and starting the video - leaning over in a provoccative way while doing so, him sitting on the bed as she turns on the video, than her coming to sit with the guy that removed her underclothes from where he was pushed onto the bed after a kiss to sit. Them going to a deep makeout that takes kiss to lay down, than blackout. She gets up, says some stuff and leads the audience to the next scene.
In scenery (thong) problem is, unlike some Sam Shepard play with corn stalks or sheep on stage as something to wonder about because it plays a role in his twisted portrait, a thong, a mini-skirt etc. unless in some huge bulk of them that’s cost prohibitive and distracting to the scene will if noticed at all unless oversized, these things you cite will at best distract from the scene you intend once the scenery out steps the players in the necessity to note or view. Guys will note such things, others will be offended. Make the scenery part of the action. Not saying that these props can’t be there, but given the short duration of the scene and the lack of personal involvement at this point with the audience, you either need a shocker of actress or actor coming out in a provocative way and showing it all as it were to show intent. (Not likely for this church group) Or possibly in getting the point across to the audience you intend to get your point across in another emotionally drawing way. I expect that underwear down stage and even a walkway of provocative items can be an option, but the guy removing or brushing aside a less obvious item of clothing in a him noting it type of 'scoring' way would be more involving.
Perhaps this is intent given the synopsis. This is what I would assume with intent. Party in the house, two girls share a bedroom, one is prissy and perfect (upstage), the other we intend thru the production to save is the vampire like person in Manson type makeup (or in other ways just not right) and in this case wearing the provoccative costume. (This provocative costume will be warn throughout up until the time of redemption where she gets something to cover her self be it chorus robe or cloak of some sort. Perhaps also the makeup is removed and a pretty girl is instead revealed after perhaps even some deforming crying like way upon the makeup.)
This also assumes the girl actress is the tour guide for the show as discussed. Tour comes in to this scene separate from the audience sent into the room in listening to the music and seeing the set in this room for a moment or ten. She does her bit on stage in drawing the audience to the action, than after a blackout stopping of the action and different lighted end of it leads the audience on her personal journey thru the rest of the show in areas she acts in as the leader of the audience stepping back into some moment of her journey or scenes she has been thru already. In this way, while leading the audience to the next scene the actress can have personal journey words to say to the audience as she takes them to the next scene/room and draws the drape apart.
You draw the audience into the action of this moving play with the first scene. If it does not involve them with spectacle and shock value in the first scene, it’s merely a show and not a method altering demonstration. The first scene is the key, make it everything in this production. Further scenes can be fun, scary, intentful and inspiring but they need to follow the hook of this girl to their reason for being there.
Next scene: (boy scene):
"talking about sexual conquests"
So the boy in the blackout has just run into the next room where he is in a locker room with the rest of his bud’s in bragging about conquests. I expect that given your school, lockers can be found even if not easy to remove initially from the hallway. Lockers open and closed are the key. You need both them and a changing bench near them supported at least by a sheet of plywood for the various people to sit or strut from. A full length mirror would also be useful for someone (antagonist) perhaps this bragging person to groom at once the rest of "the guys" finish bragging and the audience is quite again once moved. Given this second scene, this might be the perfect place for the tour leader/lead actress to give some exposition as to what little merit high school party sex has in the reality of the real relationship area. She leads the tour in while "the guys" are talking about their exploits in the locker room (make at least a few in a towel to locate the scene and draw the audience further in by way of perverse interest.) She than after also viewing this cue’d scene(she later found out about) with her former boyfriend - notch on his bedpost temporary exploit, has some words to say about the boyfriend who was not there for her later and what happened next to her.
Scene 3: Cell Phone and Internet Hell
"Text messages, IM, email and cell calls give you access like never before to wrong things."
This is sort of falling outside of the guidelines of the story presented so far.
We can cover this by personalizing it. Perhaps a call from the boyfried as the tour guide/protagonist leads the audience out of the room. It at this point would be really nice to be presented in a sort of long hallway with all kinds of presentations. A long hallway that has in side scenes presentations of keyboards and monitors showing the screen of sex tips and toys websites, various porn websites, a background sound of some porn like lyrics that are on a loop that keeps repeating the intended lyrics, a TV and VCR with a endless loop of some (soft) porn scene, a blow up/exploded pager and cell phone with it’s screen showing a clear cut message of (most important) the cell phone text message breakup between the girl and boy as huge in showing, perhaps a wall of more cell phones and pagers hanging off it, and more text messages in a provoccative way displayed on other over sized cell phones sitting on stands the audience is near.
Perhaps as a background in this long roped off hallway, beyond the various cell phones on stands near the audience, posters of cell phone messages and advertising posters of the availability of these technologies. $16.00 per month for this phone etc. as a link to the cheap charges of it all but dire consequences. Present the breakup in a very displayed and digital way, but after that and with no actors in this long hallway of a scene, don’t have any live action. This will allow time for the first two scenes to sink in, allow time for the tour guide to establish a leadership once she associates the breakup with her, and bring the haunted house into a multi-media and lead presentation show as opposed to just a bunch of scenes. Have messages perhaps of progressively worse from something like "I’m busy", to "Leave me alone - Bitch" all the way to "Satin Loves You" messages perhaps displayed on the phones on stands near to and presented to the audience as they pass by this more presentation than live event part of the show.
Scene 4: After-school party
"A night they never forget. Make-out party (drinking and smoking.)"
We started with this scene with the girl and boy, this is perhaps a later party when the girl begins to recognize that this is not what she feels most comfortable in as a setting. The other people make out, drink, smoke and party, she leaves the tour and takes part in the action at it’s center in first perhaps looking to seek out her friends that are shown to be more interested in their boyfriends they sit on the lap of than talking to her and perhaps on cue, there is a sound track to the music where people are laughing cutting in over it that grows progressively louder. The tour guide attempts more and more "friend’s" attention, only to be progressively more ignored than even pushed away. The "laughter" in the sound track sends her away to the next person at the party to ask help. She tries with them, ignored, the sound track of party laughter at someone begins and she tries for someone else. Progressively the "friends" by way of scene back of hand wave her away to the point of pushing her away at the end while the rest of the characters in a progressive way during the laughter part lean across to a friend to "tell a secret to them", than as it progresses point in a hiding way, than as the scene ends, they all during the laughter end up directly pointing at her and openly laughing at her.
Scene 5: Girl Sleep over - Brag Party
"Brag about how they got away with it, plans to repeat, some feel the guilt."
Okay, our tour guide runs out of the past room in spreading the drape for her tour to follow. Perhaps the cast of the last scene also start to mock the audience in laughing and pointing at them, if not for the lingers on people - directly confronting them.
In any case, our lead actress after a moment perhaps up against scene 6's drape in gathering herself and her audience, takes a part in the scene of sleepover. Perhaps she climbs into a sleeping bag down stage of the rest of the characters than. The girls brag and sing the praises of the guys they dream about and have exploited, this lead actress is interested initially in the action - as if at points attempting to gain the attention of the rest in asking time to speak and change the subject but constantly loses the initiative of the next guy or subject talked about. She is downstage and marginalized amongst the girls in the more upstage area surrounding the leader girl in the bed most practiced in this having fun art. Depending upon how the script works out, the lead tour guide we see is either ignored and even sort of pointed at in mocking, or she gets the attention of her "friends" but they disassociate themselves with her. In any case, I take it by way of your scene that she has just fallen out of popularity with both her buddies in the last scene and her girlfriends in this scene.
Scene 6: 4 Bedroom Scenes (dormant alcoholic & positive pregnancy test, separation from parents, sexual abuse victim declares power to use men, snse they hurt her.)
Wow’ what a scene. Described as the boyfriend awakens a generational curse of alcoholism, the girl pregnant by someone else the second time, another girl suffers with depression because of the separation of her parents. Someone else is date rated before and in her anger does not care who she hurts.
Delete this entire scene as described. Too much going on, little to do with the tour guide’s story as presented in this scene and too much going on that does not relate to our personal journey as an audience. You want a lot, have to present it elsewhere as it’s more than one story otherwise. Ok, X-guy recognized a curse of alcoholism, perhaps even being a un-wed father for more than one girl. During the party scene, perhaps with the right words spoken he stumbles down stage in telling the audience this two scenes ago as a side part of the specific scene. Perhaps it’s even the boyfriend that gives exposition to his real fear of having another child and thus just walking away from his past girl friend for the night - our tour guide. Perhaps one of the girls last scene is pregnant again to some other boyfriend and very pregnant in showing, but as opposed to our lead heroin, she is proud in it being cool that she has another kid about to be added to her high school kid pack of them. Perhaps she is even proud in that it means more welfare money and she can now afford cable TV without the need of getting a job. Exposition of the other girls brag and talk about in addition to the guys at school they have conquered. Date raped by perhaps one poor soul of a meek girl in a upstage corner of the room as requested advice from her "friends" but as per worked out in the script of - her friends just marginalis her further and laugh at the remote feeling by her that she did not want it or that it was a real rape. Get the point across during the sleep over scene in helping the lead character we by now assume is pregnant and all alone having found now not only her boyfriend and friends in general not supporting her, but her girlfriends - especially this lead girl on the bed in not supporting her. Pregnate is her fault as told to this other girl or pointed out as their own fault. The cool girl on the bed as for instance has never had these problems, her exploits for instance are a legend to live up to. All those that don’t continue to follow her or fall by the wayside in this peer group. Perhaps the queen on the bed even mocks the girl who’s parents split up at some point in raining over her followers.
In scene one if you want to present a date rape it should build upon the situation of our tour guide. Linger in blackout with her screaming "No!" after a few "Stop’s"! If this is a story about a girl, than it needs to be about this girl, otherwise in scene five you need to implement that marginaized supporting character in the upstage corner by way of script to have had this problem in a way that matters but is less involving and caustic to the audience but still gets the point across. One might also have the room’s queen on the bed referring to date rape drugs in a cool sort of way than.
For me, Scene 6 does have some form of role, it’s in confirming our tour guide has realized she has a real problem of being pregnant for the audience. She up to now has no support of the boyfriend, her friends at the party turn away and mock her, her girlfriends specifically also don’t support her in her problem. Perhaps even telling any of them will be a problem.
Scene 6 might be a smaller hallway between scenes and in in general deleted. Just a bare bones toilet off stage, a wrapper for a pregnancy test method alone on the floor, and a large "test positive" poster as seen covering the backstage wall. Let’s do a bunch of exploded headlines in the newspaper posted all over these blackened walls, "teen pregnancy" and across from the scene, some blackboard filled with writing all over it with census statistics, poverty ratios etc. showing a grim future for this poor girl.
She just leads into, pauses in the area, than leads the crowd into the next area. The personal choice and realization is got by the audience without need to say anything else. As a sound effect on a loop, pounding on a door by someone pleeding to get into the washroom - someone telling our tour guide that they "gotta" get into the bathroom, mom and dad fighting in the background over this. Sound effect as a constant - every few seconds, pounding on the door breaking up the background of Mom and Dad fighting with even Mom being beaten in this sound tape loop of sound effect home life.
That’s at least as I see the horror of this scene as easier and more specifically put.
Scene seven: " "Jail Cell" (Boyfriend is charged with molestating of a minor - tour guide is 16.) I’m thinking that at some point in between rooms, it might be better for some cops to pull someone out of the audience - a shill and arrest him on these publically stated charges. For this, the boyfriend needs to become a part of the audience. A jail cell if you will forgive me is lame in something that most will view as exhibit and expect they will never see in their holier than though status. Arrest a member of the audience and right in front of them and you have their - all of their involvement. Smack around the boyfriend even but it will take careful coordination with our tour guide in showing her involvement - escaping to a higher religious plane and lawful justification of her role type way. Perhaps the initial boyfriend is much, much older, is scraggly etc. seeming as a description of him.
Scene eight: "Abortion room" (X actresss represents adult X.. Who is at the point of suicide, as the demon try and convince her to kill herself, the ganels show her the way to Jesus via the salvation prayer.
You know, I just don’t see this scene given your intent of last time it was portrayed in show gory and well acted abortion room as a scene. We have the protagonist by now with a serious problem of an un-wanted baby growning in her, she has by way of acting and action just gotten her boyfriend arrested in having crossed out the rest of that or the previous scene as not important or part of the journey, taken us to a leep of justice in what was done in him having done this to her. She has grown in the eyes of the audience beyond her peers and girl friends. Now it’s time for personal choice which I myself might dispute with you but have to in any case rectify with the scene and story. (We won’t get into my own views on all this thing as it is your presentation which I on the whole support the presentation of.) Daddy getting arrested might take place in this for the most part down lit room without any scenery. Once daddy is led away, lets’ personalize this obvious choice.
Daddy gets arrested in the same room as this scene, than the lights go up on an out of audience area and the audience see Mom/tour guide pressed spread eagle against a window of an abortion room. Beyond this window frame the audience peers thru and the tour guide in pressing against it gets a very clear view of, we have your famous abortion scene. It can be as wicked as you plan given the horror now presents itself upon the tour guide in by the end of it and her peeling herself off the window, leads painfully the audience away from the hellatious scene and onto the next.
Scene eight: "Satin’s Meeting" Long hallway, or perhaps the above less wide but in depth hallway but moving platform he moves around or war chariot he taunts the souls from in addition to the audience. This is a throw away scene, in the tour guide having walked away from the abortion, she is either taunted by Satin to do away with the kid anyway if not as presented before the previous scene in tempting her, or he just calls to all in a sort of black humor way she as tour guide is dumbfounded in as presentation but gains inspiration from. Not sure if two strongly acted by the anatomist scenes in a row are a good thing or not given the talent I expect for both scenes, but this is how it’s presented. Perhaps have a pre-scene with Satin challenging and offering solution in all his power before the abortion scene as part one, than after the abortion in him in a less than all involved moving scenery way, have him running after the lead and audience in asking to come back, the problems she will have, lack of support in the community etc. in attempting to get her back to the room.
Thus before abortion, we have some glory and scare of Satin on a chariot and long room in being scary but reasonable in having the abortion as the only solution, than a abortion room she chooses against, followed by a linearly long room of the same satin taunting the lead and audience, asking her to come back, telling her to come back etc. but walked away from. Long room, lots of taunts and definate need for a rope to separate audience from Satin. We also are left with the question of if she had it done or not - below will be a description of blood but it is also more of a symbolism type of thing and could be more the soul bleeding out of guilt for considering it than reaity.
Scene nine: "Who you gonna serve" (X represents and adult X... who is at the point of suicide, as a demon try and convince her to kill herself, the angels show her the way to Jesus via the salvation prayer.)
Another throw away scene. Unless you have more than one Satin per group, this is not a individual room. It also just don’t work given the pregnancy / date rape concept. Older by 9 - months? Sorry but invest in many tour guides rather than an older than type if possible for this scene. You have a lot of tallent perspective, use them kids even, it is their show.
If necessary perhaps have the tour guide seek refuge in a well placed sofa that the Devil upstages and leans over at times in this hallway. Perhaps even the boyfriend or some other guy is already on the sofa in a "yea I care for you type of way." They than care for but also take advantage of. Perhaps the girl’s dad sits down in the boyfriend’s place and cuddles her for a moment but perhaps hears a cop siren and bolts away. (Yes it’s stereo typing and not accurate but it’s a statement none the less and reason to move onto Mom.) Perhaps Mom finally sits down on the self doubt and "hell" sofa to support her kid. Devil lingering and abusing from the upstage by now and distracting from away. Mom sits down now and either does not care or is supportive depending upon your take of it all. Offers advice to go to the next scene or the tour guide does it on her own.
Still we have a sofa right off the audience the girl cowers in, some amount of people both supporting and not supporting her if not only un-supporting of her. Suicide can be thoughts brought up by the Devil in between people that sit on the sofa with her. Perhaps in keeping the audience attention and them away from her, this sofa is positioned and located atop a high staircase and platform that all can see her from and is too far in distance for them to personally get involved. The devil should be able to look over her on the sofa by way of ladder, but at this point also be able to have the rest of the acting area to move about as it’s his.
Scene nine B: (The audience help her say the prayer.. But does not know if was too late or not.) Speaking as an outsider again to this as perhaps best in someone not involved but in a scene that will most draw the audience to your intent, this scene both does not have location and does not have a place in reality or story. Not really sure how you intend to implement this.
I see this as part of the last scene. Either Mom in prayer helping or our tour guide alone in finding her own way perhaps starts to say this "Lord’s prayer". It’s a chant, with every sentence of it in the past scene the audience will hopefully start to repeat especially if helped by shills (members of your crew) in the audience, the devil is more confounded than chased away. What ever the case, the Devil in his personality would be by my thoughts of it the one to mock and challenge the audience to sign this book of support for the heroin as opposed to the more reasonable and easy supporting him. Perhaps behind the audience by way of down light this huge book to sign, a huge guest book is revealed by his mocking cue for the audience to sign. Given the talent of your Devil, he should have no problems in making the audience sign the book of support. Otherwise, he can mock and challenge an equally strong Mom and perhaps tour guide in gaining strength. Want your visitors to sign, this is the time.
If they don’t know if it’s too late or not, the Devil will have to provide the inspiration in any case as the protagonist grows weaker on her on or in Mom’s arms.
Scene Nine C: "Hell" (Satin has lost souls of teens in all types of bondage "torturing" them. Has a book of death that he taunts the audience about.) Again not a scene unless more than one devil which would not work well given different personalities and story lines.
Instead, this book of his, perhaps incorporate into the before scene. The Teens under torture are perhaps those pulling his wagon in having told their story beforehand while pulling the cart. Perhaps one by one as they pull the cart and get whipped afterwards, they tell their simplified story of how they got into hell one by one. In any case, this scene is well already done as a short scene, the more climax final scene following the abortion needs to focus upon your intent I think in getting public support by way of signing for this poor girl.
By the end, he is vanished by his and perhaps’ Mom’s words and the words of God in coordination with the book signers and Word of God. The girl / tour guide gains strength in this new found support and finally banishes him than leads the audience to the next room.
Scene Nine D: "Step Off" (Demons against Angels. Angels win and stomp demons.)
I expect you already realize that this scene as a tour of the Hell anti-fright house we are viewing is about over with. While there is only so many planes of Hell, our story as at least I see it as more narrowly defined to one person’s story the audience can better communicate with, is just about done by now. She won. This challenge - swords no doubt involved in expelling demons is not the point of the conflict. If nothing else, the angels in the last part of this room’s scene chase the lingering devils out on cue but otherwise have no true role.
Instead, what if this were a double sized room. First we have a sofa upon steps the tour guide runs for refuge upon. She has her tribulations of soul on it and the upstage of it is revealed once the Satin we met two scenes before comes to play on her. (You are going to need two Satins given timing and a tour.) Satin taunts her in her deserving either the abortion or having a welfare kid. Does not matter for him, it’s either a soul he gets right away or get’s to taunt also in acquiring.
Mom as a third role is silent but begins to pray over her child now. She does not hear Satin, only cares for her child in now praying. Otherwise the child in finding inner strength in spite of the challenges and torments she hears, (perhaps the sister who’s room she shared helps her instead of these people, so many variations we could have. Sister at the door in the opening scene objecting to a boyfriend in the bedroom, than the door slammed in her face.) These people help her or she gets with God and finding her way in any case. The audience helps find and support her in finding the way by way of signing the book as the scene builds.
But as I said, perhaps this is a double wide scene in being both two sides of the audience in the center, and both God/Jesus and Satin on stage at once. Do you remember this long room in the last time we attempted the show, a Jesus in the last room welcoming in the end all comers? Distance, far away, but in the direction the audience traveled, and oh the stage presence the talented actor had and highlight by spot he had.
Let’s re-create it. First signer to the book perhaps gets a dim light on Jesus somewhere out in the distance. He does not move or talk to Satin but is still dimly lit way upstage of the book. More people sign the book and the down light on him in a welcoming pose gets brighter up until it sparkles in light on him. We also add a front light so his features are not so ghostly. We build upon this light, still him remote, but given the building as opposed to visibility light behind us, we are drawn to him at a distance. Satin than mocks from behind the audience. If not he directly challenges those that would dare look to him instead of Jesus figure.
At some point our tour guide/protagonist is welcomed to him. She looks back to the audience as she walks to him in conveying the necessity of them in her voyage, grows in look from despising them all perhaps to thanking them etc. She walks the path of light now lit to Jesus. Perhaps it’s a path you open up to others in the audience to follow as sent there and escorted by way the shills in the audience. Satin by now is banished. Jesus did not have much to do with it, it was more an interplay between the girl and him in denying him or Girl, Him and Mom in defending her. What ever the end result, Satin leaves and it’s quiet. Perhaps before this point there is some very subliminal suffering of souls music that fades out and upon the walk is replaced by a inspiring rhythm.
In costume change, Perhaps during the arrest of the "boyfriend" scene, she downs a hospital gown that is say plain white and simple but not seen yet to be stained with black light paint all over with red paint. First we see the pure and simple white in atoning for the sins and making one’s way with justice, than we get the blood. We than while she is prostate against the window light up with some black light lamps that show the UV-now bloody gown over her cheap woman outfit and atoning gown. Further black light directed to the sofa and stairs perhaps reveal a lot of UV-red blood all over the stairs. You don’t have to say that it was done or it was the choice, only state the blood involved and shame in even considering it. There will be shame or at least some deep thoughts no matter the choice afterwards no matter the benefits or rational for not doing it. This UV-blood now along with Satin’s carefully worked out words bring up the problem as exposition either way if it was done to the girl or not.
In leaving the sofa, perhaps she pulls the sofa cover off it and put’s it on as a long flowing chorus gown or dress of reflective and perhaps UV supplemented colored gown in a third costume. Some sort of Queenly or marriage gown type of thing which glows in both UV and spotlight. Perhaps if part of the story, Mom puts it on her after Satin is banished by her in a "big Momma" type way in adding at least a element of comedy. In any case, as our tour guide walks the distance between sofa, stairs, audience area and that long distance to Jesus, she in her almost wedding gown of purity pulls the loop from her hair so it flows down further bridging that purity to her acceptance as she walks the long walk.
If the audience is still lingering, once she finds perhaps a hug from Jesus, she jestures for the audience to follow in ensuring they all will. Jesus off this path welcomes but stays a little distant. She walks out the door into a prayer room where she kneels up stage of the rest of the pews. The audience either follows or exits our little passion play.
This whole last scene thus gains as much importance as the first scene in development.
Thus is some of my further advice in unifying the story into a unified program. Any help? Chat with you I expect soon about it. This is advice do not forget, and you are it’s project manager. Do not follow any suggestions as word of law, only as I in attempting to further refine this program might see some solutions in unifying it. It’s your show, my intent is to push it beyond the good show into the great show. I see many themes in this show still, while they can be sub text, I think further refining into one unified theme in this production is still necessary. Other productions can have other themes, let’s work on the main one at this point and keep them in mind for later ones.
Good start, hope my refining is useful, we can talk about the build and lighting with details later after the script and story is locked down.
