I'm sorry about the relationship between your house manager and stage manager...
When I SM, I make a point of introducing myself to the house manager. The HM for smaller shows is often a parent volunteer (whose knowledge of house management is they get to wear a tag around their neck with the title) so often I have to find them and ask specifically how much longer they need, or if they're ready on time a couple times before I actually start. For larger shows, we often have event coordinators acting as the HMs, but it's still important to seek them out and make sure everyone is up to date on the plans.
Of course, don't start without the HM's g-o.
When I SM, I make a point of introducing myself to the house manager. The HM for smaller shows is often a parent volunteer (whose knowledge of house management is they get to wear a tag around their neck with the title) so often I have to find them and ask specifically how much longer they need, or if they're ready on time a couple times before I actually start. For larger shows, we often have event coordinators acting as the HMs, but it's still important to seek them out and make sure everyone is up to date on the plans.
Of course, don't start without the HM's g-o.