How many techs does it take to change a lightbulb?

EPAC_Matt

Member
Joined
Feb 9, 2004
Apparently it took 4 -- and an hour to do so, during maintenance.

We had been fighting with a parcan on our third electric batten, trying to follow it's cable through the tangle of other cables and find out what circuit it was patched into, etc... The darn thing just wouldn't work! Took an hour to realize there was no lamp in the fixture :)

Good times. :roll:
 

digitaltec

Active Member
Joined
Oct 10, 2003
Location
Pittsburgh, PA
Seems like you kids need to do some re-organization. Thats why you always label everyting on both ends and have sheets telling you what goes to what. Let this be a lesson to you. :lol:
 

zac850

Well-Known Member
Joined
Nov 21, 2003
Location
New York
Ahh, yes, spend hours going through all of the small details, only to realize that you over looked a major thing, such as not having a lamp in it.

As digitaltec said, it helps to label everything, and have a piece of paper (lightwrite file) that says what is going where, what circuit, and into what dimmer.

On that note, acutely, on a completely different note:
How many straight actors does it take to change a light bulb?


Both of them.
 

propmonkey

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 22, 2004
Location
Milwaukee, WI
my freshmen year(when i knew nothing) it took me and the old light guy(nice guy but he knew crap aboot lighting) 15 mins to change a fersnel. he didnt know and never have done it before.
 

EPAC_Matt

Member
Joined
Feb 9, 2004
Eh, we had gone along the raceway with a pad of paper and took note of the fixture's distances, circuits, etc... but the whole things a mess of cables and I guess mistakes do happen.

As for the missing bulb, we had thought we changed the lamp out but apparently we got sidetracked and forgot to stick the new lamp in, so when we had came back to the fixture, as you could've gessed, we were stumped.
 

avkid

Not a New User
Fight Leukemia
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Feb 17, 2004
Location
Lakewood, NJ
wow! that is sad, i once wrotes a series of notes(about 10) to the LD about what i thought was a burntout bulb. he called me crazy, but later it turned out that the bulb had melted into the fresnel and totally screwed it up. The moral of the story is always listen to everyone's opinion no matter how dumb you think they are, they just could be right for once!!!
 

jmsinick

Member
Joined
Jan 26, 2004
Location
Gainesville, FL
the bs process I have to go through to change our worklights on our grid.

one guy to put in work order to change light
one guy to come assess how many lamps to purchase and of what kind
one guy to request to order said lamps in said quanities
one guy to quote/price out and order said lamps
one guy to recieve said lamps
two theatre studends to take said lamps up to grid
a different guy to come and install the new lamps because the assor is afraid of heights
and the last guy to sweep up the dead flies from the light covers

person count: 9

I've been waiting for over three months to get these changed and they still aren't yet. If it wasn't for the facilities union (not to dog the unions or our facilities personel, all are great people) I would have changed all of these lights already.

Jeremy
 

Radman

Well-Known Member
Joined
Apr 9, 2004
Location
Franklin, TN
I used to live in MI. Answer to question:

A few.

(I all of a sudden got really lazy...)
 

BigGorilla

Member
Joined
Aug 26, 2004
Some of my favorite responses to the question, "So, what WAS wrong with the light?"

A. "Um, we forgot to plug it in."
B. "We didn't patch it into the board."
C. the everpopular, "No lamp."
D. "I thought the 'new kid' was going to hang that light."

and the new most popular...

E. "It was something dumb, so I'm not telling you because you snort through your nose when you laugh."

BigGorilla
 

ccfan213

Active Member
Joined
Jun 20, 2004
Location
Maryland
once i spent at least an hour trying to get an amp to work only to discover it was unplgged because when i used it the day before it was working and a contractor had unplugged it. moral of the story: check the obvious first
 

hans44

Member
Joined
Feb 28, 2005
Location
Florida
anon said:
You all failed to answer the posters original question, How many techs does it take to change a lightbulb?

HELLO PEOPLE!!! It's a LAMP not a LIGHTBULB!!!
From Harry C. Box's Set Lighting Technician's Handbook, Third Ed.:

How many directors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. No, two. No, no one.

How many gaffers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, no two . . . how many do you have on the truck?

How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It's not a bulb, it's a globe.

How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Grips don't change light bulbs. That's electric
ALTERNATE:
Two. One to hold it and the other to hammer it in.

How many executive producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Executive producers don't screw in light bulbs. They screw in hot tubs.

How many production managers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None! If you'd just make it a day exterior we wouldn't have to keep screwing around with all these light bulbs!

How many ACs (camera assistant) does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Five. One to screw it in and four to tell you how they did it on the last show.

How many fire safety officers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, but it's an 8-hour minimum.

How many teamsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Four. You got a problem with that?

How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got a really nice candelabra we could use.

To finish the list:

STUNTMEN: Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how b**chin' he looked doing it.

STUDIO EXECS: No one knows. Light bulbs last much longer than studio execs.

ACTORS: 100. One to screw it in and 99 to say they could have done it better.

SCREEN WRITERS: The light bulb is IN and it is staying IN!

EDITORS: If we change the light bulb we'll have to change everything.


(Once again, thanx to Mr. Box for these GREAT works of comedy. BUY HIS BOOK!)
 

Dustincoc

Active Member
Joined
Sep 7, 2006
Location
Madrid, New York
My personal Favorite WHAT WAS WRONG WITH IT REPLY?:

It was possesed. Which reminds me, the Leko's still in his office where we locked it up that night, 2 years ago.
 

porkchop

Well-Known Member
Joined
Feb 19, 2008
Location
Vegas
Don't you love the ridiculous situations you can get yourself into doing the simplest things. All the more reason to keep a gamcheck in the tool bag. I love that tool more and more every time it saves me from scratching my head and wondering wtf is wrong.
 

Spikesgirl

Active Member
Joined
Mar 3, 2008
Location
CA
Don't you love the ridiculous situations you can get yourself into doing the simplest things. All the more reason to keep a gamcheck in the tool bag. I love that tool more and more every time it saves me from scratching my head and wondering wtf is wrong.
You took the words out of my mouth - what especially annoys me is when it takes your a couple of hours to realize the bleeding obvious. We had our lighting designer throw a wonky once because a PAR wouldn't come on. After berating us for not circuiting it properly (it was), not maintain the lights correctly - you know where I'm going with this - he forgot to plug the light into a circuit...never an apology, never a moment of humility, he just went on to his next tirade. He was a fun LD - NOT!

Char5lie

P.S. the only thing funnier than not having a lamp in a fixture is watching a Drama student trying to drive in screws with a Makita in reverse - especially after they decline your help.
 

Eboy87

Well-Known Member
Joined
May 3, 2004
Location
Chicago, IL
I thought the answer to the age old question of "How many techies does it take to screw in a light builb?" was obvious.

Two. Provided they could find one big enough. :lol:

It's been one of those kinds of days so far
 

RiffRaff54

Member
Joined
Jun 3, 2005
Location
North-east Ohio
The way I heard it was this:

"How many techies does it take to change a light bulb?"

"It's called a lamp and it's not funny."

eh, on a related subject, whats the difference between a light bulb and a pregnent woman?

You can unscrew the light bulb
 

Lightingguy32

Active Member
Joined
May 2, 2006
Location
New York
1 if they are properly trained.
3 or more when not: 1 to ask another techie, another techie to ask some one who is trained and then the someone who is trained ends up replacing the lamp.