Has anyone ever built one? The script has several gags built around this item and its player roll.
Suggestions on how to build or substitute ideas welcome.
I would suggest looking at Salvation Army/thrift stores. The last time I was in a show requiring a player piano, we were able to find one at our Salvation Army store for $50. It no longer had the player mechanism, so we simply added a motor (We used an old rock tumbler that already had spinning spools) and made a roll for it. You should also check piano stores, especially ones that sell and repair antique pianos. I found out that a local piano place recently trashed a few dozen old players because there just wasn't the market for them and they didn't have space to store them.