soundman said:
This one only works on the truly green ones, tell them to get you a 2*4 about 18 inches long then when they bring it you you ask them if they measued it when it turns out to be 1.5*3.5 give them some crap and say next time measure it. Not a waste of time if you have them sort wood while the hunt for the true 2*4
Reminds me that after the inventory I'm working on with the new college graduate is done, I need to
send him out for a
halogen pressure tester for some of these lamps, than for the filler machine. Others with more experience will know what he is looking for and
send him to the next location to find such a thing as the person that had it last. Up until this person hits "the old man of the theater" in the shop what will belittle him sufficiently for asking for such a thing.
Had one game at one
point beyond the can of "elbow grease" or bucket of muzzle flash, much less ID10T forms we used to
send people for in the military.
Presented here:
February 29, 2000
Operation New Guy #1
Premises: Un-Specified New guy is sent to Brian by his Crew Chief, Steve or Tommy to get an MSR 1200 Lamp.
Brian gives a MSR 1200/2 as normal and sends the subject away. Tommy receives the lamp and sends him back with it for an MSR 1200 old style Lamp instead.
This is the trigger which sets the ball in motion:
Brian takes back the lamp and takes out the 1200. He signs out the new lamp, opens it up, shakes it, looks at it, remarks “wow that is low,” than tells the new guy he had better check to see if Johnny, packed an extra pound of
mercury vapor in the
road box because 'Kid from the
hoist department had mentioned it was going to be really hot down south. “At least that is what I think Kid Mentioned.” You might also check with Kid on that.
New guy goes to John to
relay my message:
John becomes really interested in what new guy has to say and needs to know what the exact pressure is going to be to know what weight to put in. Ask Kid what the pressure is?
New guy goes to Kid and asks. 'Kid replies rain, and does not remember after that. Go ask Greg from the tansport department what the pressure is supposed to be at that event, he tracks stuff like that. Only do not say it too loud or we will have to put covers on all of our filters, and do not let Tony the equipment manager know or he will get pissed.
New guy goes to Greg and asks the pressure: Greg asks where the event is? In the case the person knows what city it is in, he shuffles some paper on his
desk, and comes up with a reading of 50.6. If the New guy does not know he sends him back to his crew chief to find out with a “why don’t you know where it is,” thrown in for good measure.
New guy returns to Johnny with the pressure. Johnny writes it down on a
road box label for the show as fifty weight, and tells him to tell Brian “I am getting low in fifty PSI.”
New guy returns to me to state the weight of
Mercury Vapor needed. Brian receives the info and asks what brand of lamp? Brian than drops what he is doing and stomps off to seemingly yell at Johnny while mumbling bad things under his breath. As he stomps up the stairs, he tells new guy, “you had better tell _______ (crew chief) to pack the vapor pressure test kit.
New guy returns to his crew chief and relays both the message and the lamp. Crew chief opens up the lamp and shakes it, looks at it than remarks “yup it is low” than sends New guy to 'Sluggo (Head of the
Leko Prep Department) to get the kit and show him how to use it. Only do not let Tony know you taking it, say if he asks you are looking for an empty
road box. “Here take this lamp with you, you will need it to test it.”
New guy goes to Eric/sluggo (these nicknames have a reason behind them) and asks for it. Eric in an un-friendly way sends New guy to 'Oscar or any of the back aisle guys if he does not know Oscar. It should be by the
fog machines he tells the new guy. “I’m busy now, come back and see me when you are ready to test it.”
New guy goes to the back aisle and asks:
thru the rough translation between a very Spanish understanding Oscar and a English speaking New Guy should take some time to no avail.
(P.S. Oscar is not in on the joke.)
New guy returns to Eric, probably with Oscar in tow. Eric gets pissed off and leads the two over to the
smoke machine area to look. If Oscar (in not knowing what we are talking about, much less bad English) does not originally come with New Guy, Eric gets to
call him over and demand he help find the thing. “We are looking for a box about the size of a "F-200"
fog machine.” (Just to confuse the issue!)
After a little while looking, Eric asks Oscar where he put the blue box that 'Slayer brought back from New York last night? In the end, he sends the New guy over to Slayer (the truck
driver) to find out where the box is.
When New guy arrives at Slayer, he points to the dock and says it should be out there.
New guy goes to the dock and looks for a moment than comes back to Slayer. Slayer upset with him takes New guy back to the dock to look to no avail. After a moment, he tells the new guy to ask Kid where he put it.
New guy goes to Kid who pleads innocently he did not touch it, he puts the New guy
thru the third degree than sends him to Tom (the janitor - who is also not in on the joke, ) to see if he moved it, but not to let Daric (Shop Manager) or Tony (Equipment manger) know or they will get really pissed. You had better tell your crew chief if Tom (Head of the Electronics Repair Area) does not have it.
New guy goes to Tom who of course has never heard of such a thing, and soon goes back to his crew chief.
New guy arrives back at his Crew Chief and tells the bad news. His crew chief gets really pissed with the new guy, and puts him
thru another third degree, than sends New guy off to ask Tom from electronics/moving lights, to see if he has an extra one. He also hands back the lamp and tells him to show him this.
New guy arrives at Tom and asks for the spare vapor pressure kit: Tom takes the lamp, Shakes it, looks at it, than says that it's low but there is no spare and He had better the kit or everyone will be here late looking for it.
New guy goes back to his crew chief and tells him the bad news. His crew chief seems very upset and tells him to go tell Daric ...”It Is Lost.”
Op.New Guy was forwarded as a plan to the various people in the know, but never accomplished to a sufficient
level. We also avoided the "old man of the theater" visit as a newer factor in someone to visit while not in the know about the joke. Today, the 'Old Man works under the Kid in having their own department - the 'Kid's primary focus in in keeping the department running including and especially in keeping the 'old man focused upon getting work done as he is easily distracted. Most of the people in the game have been replaced and new department heads. Still those remaining members would quickly catch on in continuing the game.
The End.